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DeadJournal for Neglected Porn Star.
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| Sunday, July 11th, 2004 |
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what time is it now: 139 pm name: tikira ross nicknames: Charlie b,aleria,kira,skittles online name: otep_slave,blackrose sex: female age: 17 sign: scorpio…sexy height: 5’8 weight: 130+ hair color: black,blond,red,orange eye color: dark brown hair length: some of it is very short and the rest is medium…..yeah I need to cut it wear glasses: no teeth straight: I have an overbite but it’s not noticible have freckles: naw fake tooth: um..no fake eye: what?...no draw fake moles on yourself: actually…no highest level of HS: 11th grade... do you work: yeah,mostly weekends how do you dress: jeans with my 3row stud belt, and a tee smoke: occasionally. drink: in private do drugs: iam a drug have friends: a few online friends: not really like your online friends: well there as good as imaginary friends..so any kids: nope any pets: nope,but I’ll get a ferret car: yep…but I can’t drive live on your own: no live with your parents: for the time favorites: type of music: metal, alternative shit. actor: john cusack, brad pitt (that’s all I can think of actress: ur…kirstan dunst(she’s in cool movies) movie: got a lot……fight club,the craft,sleppy hallow,DAZED AND CONFUSED,crazy/beautiful,boys don’t cry,what dreams may come,high fidelity,empire records,slums of bervely hills,that’s all I can think of soda: sprite no ice food: creamcheese bagel I guess car: el cameno(iam white trash) hobby: guitar,writing,sleeping,random outburst sport: ick musician: Courtney love, John fruciante,otep Shamaya artist: amy brown author: duh…chuck pahalnuck(think I spelled it right) song:got a lot….staind-it’s been a while,RHCP-don’t forget me,otep-confession,Afi-hidden track on STS and morning star,Nirvana-heart shaped box and man who sold the world….that’s all I can think of I have tons more color: p!nk and black tv show: friends,cops brand of beer: smirnoff liquor: alize smokes: Turkish jade,Newport,camels,cloves drug: got any? clothes: anything i can move in... record label: brand of glue: I really don’t give a fuck online test: the quizilla ones online chat thing: msn shape: pentagram texture: velour game: solitare…that’s sad place: a corner year: 84…naw…2005 holiday: Halloween,thankgiving quote: got a lot….can’t think of them…. animal: ferret sound: silence book: ha…choke,suvivior,invisible monsters,go ask alice, smack,already dead,outsiders, drink: tea lies have you lied:I doubt it do you lie: not really lie often: no lie to save your own ass: depends lie to save someone elses ass: depending on the person would you tell a lie that stopped your death but caused the death of your lover: naw would you tell a lie that stopped your death but caused the death of your enemy: um…we’ll see would you tell alie that let you keep your job but fired you friend: no... would you tell a lie that let you keep your job but fired "that bitch you work with": yup…actually the people I work with will kill…so maybe not have you lied to gain money: I think so would you lie to gain money: probably do you enjoy lying to strangers: yup, if I don’t know someone and I don’t care to know them I’ll pretty make up crazy shit just for fun have you ever enjoyed lying to a stranger: yup would you dare to lie in the face of evil: what? dare to lie in the face of your mother: I’ve done that so much,it used to be second nature dare to lie in the face of your God: god? what’s the point would you lie to get laid: *I wonder have you lied to get laid: again I wonder would you lie to get a job: yeah have you lied to get a job: nope would you lie to get a date: yeah have you lied to get a date: about my age maybe are lies really that harmless: I guess, but it’s too much work to keep up lies do you lie on online surveys: not really do you lie online: age yeah if lying is sunful.. are you going to hell: u know it love life are you single: yes are you with someone: no are you married: no divorced: no "separated": maybe "on break": maybe ever been in love: sure how many times: once…twice…three times….shit I say one true love and a couple of hard to get over puppy luv with stupid boys looking back you do regret it: not the true love…but I did waste energy on some unworthy people date people you meet online: not really,but I wood date people you meet at bars: we’ll see "net date": *confused look* are you happy with your current status: no not really, I wouldn’t mind someone to hang out with and…..never mind have a crush on someone close to you: no…I did like the one guy at school, but only because that whie chick thinks she can get him….i did like the white guy but iam over both are you still holding onto the past: yup….waiting for it to be my present do you agree that jet li is a good husband of shajuana: lwho? the following apply to you? Y/N witty: I think charming: uh… quiet: y loud: only when iam not being quiet pretty: y radical: yes sucky: to some smart: yes stupid: yes dumbass: no ugly: no slow: yeah fast: yeah talented: not really useless: to most punk: in ways young: yes, but sometimes I feel old old: I’ll die soon past your prime: I hope not reaching your prime: I doubt it…but I’ll die young dashing: ur daring: I try to be powerful: *sometimes athletic: far from it superhuman: you know it sexy: from head to toe…well maybe not my toes j/k. the following are Good/Bad sex: GOOD,Great love: maybe if it exsisted…the tought o love is good..i guess happiness:good…hard to find,but good rap: it’s goind down hill…but actually it’s still pretty good, especially skater rap pain: good.great pop music: some is good iam not gonna lie anime: overated tv: oh the idiot box…it’s good for now country: I can handle it metal: some good nu metal: some…few good death metal: eh…ok industrial: eh..ok punk rock: old skool..goood.but all the redundant new shit…shameful easy listening: crap korn: ok murderous rampage: sounds good sega: good nintendo: good play station: good game boy:bad chinese food: good italian food: good japanese food: idk mexican food: good online quizzes: when iam bored online surveys: when iam bored What...? whats your deep dark secret- can’t say biggest fear- I think it’s getting old, having to work all my life and clean up after kids greatest sexual experience- outside at night in the rain on a trampoline best date ever- when I went to the movies with justin worst date- when I went to the movies wih luke…he wacked off right next to me most embarrassing thing: uh….it’s only embarrassing if you let it be good candidate for jerry springer- my family and friends anime isnt that bad is it- no agree that DVD is much better then VHS- yes do you hate america- no hate terrorism- some, iam into anarchy and radicals hate western culture- no like america- I can deal like americans- I can deal vote for bush- cant vote yet, but I probably would canadian- nope belive your country is doing ok or would you change things-the things I wanna change won’t be….so are you conservative or liberal- niether immiagration in american is outta hand- yeah but ain’t shit you can do about it so move do you think that group of black people suing some southern company for profiting on slavery in the 1800s has a good claim-unfortunately or do you think if they actually win, that every native american should sue england, france, and spain for invading them and profiting off them: I wood religion are you religous- no do you believe in a higher being: sure why not…someones gotta save me…but iam inbetween is every religion wrong except your own- no because religions are just comfort things is your God the only god- I have many gods and goddess are you going to heaven- i am going to another universe or starting a new program are you going to hell- look up money do you like it: I guess do you have any- I have a check waiting on me that’ll have to go to school make a lot of it- I make enough get money through illegal ways- sometimes I steal pay taxes- no don’t have to do you think you shouldnt- er? finally who did you get this survey from: what time is it:716pm what time did you go to sleep last night- about 6am what was the last noise you heard before you went to sleep- my sister going to work the last thing you said- probably some moans what did you dream about- don’t remember do you drool or snore when you sleep- neither when did you wak up- 10am how did you wake up- I woke up like 3 times b4 I finally got up whats the first thing that crossed your mind when you woke up- might ass welll stay up when was the last time you took a shower- 12pm when was the last time you said i love you to the opposite sex and meant it, family doesnt count- I think I told tavorris I still loved him like a month ago where was the last place you went outside of your house- on the steps to play with the neighbors dog who was the last friend you saw- shit…..Jackie I guess who was the last friend you talked to- Gloria in e-mail,Jackie on the phone whos the one person you would die without- Jackie…I guess whats your fave song- don’t ask that fave album-afi sing the sorrow how many times have you been in love- a couple are you in love with anyone right now- old flames still burn if you could kill one person, who would it be: myself how many pillows are on your bed- 1 what color is the bottle of shampoo you use and what kind is it- yellow…motions what color is the soap you use and kind- white what color is your razor- pink what kind of deodorant do you use: suave what kinda cologne/perfume do you wear- "happy" clinique how long are you nails right now- my left hand is cut short to play guitar and the right nails are pretty long how old is the comp: 3years Damn I thought this shit was over who was the last person to annoy you- my brother do you believe in God- who knows…iam into everything how long are the showers you take- 11min how many showers do you take a week- 12 do you love your parents- honestly...yeah do you live your siblings- yeah…truly my best and worst friends whats the worst thing that ever happened to you: so many…I guess when that guy left and when I started relations with that girl…..and when me and my dad got into that fight whens the last time you cried- I started crying yesterday but I made myself stop why: i get depressed often and I hadn’t been in a while, so I guess it was time..but I was feeling like shit and unwanted last time you wished you were dead- yesterday,but it didn’t last long the last time you felt important- shit 2 days ago when I did a good job in the studio and had a good day last time you felt sad because someone close to you was hurting-I guess when Jackie was talking about onee of her boyfriends like 2 weeks ago last time you screamed- *I scream everyday have you ever physically hurt yourself- yeah, I stopped cutting my arm, but now I cut my stomach…but I haven’t done it in a while how smart are you: meh, i could be smarter if i applied myself once in a while what person are you extremely attracted to and not just because of looks- myself do you like being outside: mmhmm, love it at night when its cold who do you look up to- no one….i wanna do something different whos the last person that made you cry- myself is emotional pain or physical pain worse- emotional, but unfortunately Ia addicted to it where do you want to live: everywhere…Alaska,Florida,California,Tex how many scars are on your body- 6 on left wrist,3 on left arm,1on right arm,4 on stomach,a carved heart on my left leg,a carved name on my right leg with another scar, and 1 on myleft foot,1on my roght ankle, and a deep one on my left thigh how many people do you love-everyone actually whos your best friend(s)- Jackie,brit,jonathan,Antonio,Gloria,(Da krew) who do you turn to for advice- Jackie,brit if you could bring back one person from the dead, who would it be- my bird tweety on a scale of 1-10 how happy are you- truly 7 on a scale of 1-10, how depressed are you- 9 most of the time….actually deep down all the time what color are the sheets on your bed- white with flowers how many cds do you own- going on 50 I guess what 3cds do you wish to own- the new kitie, hole,the killers,amphibious assault,nin(downward spiral), what is your greatest regret- starting things with G.That was my fault.and a lot a shit I did in elementary when was the last time you were sick- 2 weeks ago I had a cold are you hurting anywhere right now- my back what do you wish you were doing right now- eating when was the last time you had a nightmare- don’t know are you talking to anyone right now- no what are you talking about- nope whos the last person you were on the phone with- my dad are you pale- no iam black when was the last time you brushed you hair- when I got out of the shower have you ever wanted plastic surgery- yeah…I want to get/nerver mind how many s/ns do you have-3 which one do you use the most- otep_slave |
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| Sunday, June 6th, 2004 |
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blaaaah... just got in an hour ago.This was the longest day at work ever.I forgot how much i hate my home store but i did have fun seeing everybody.i think i workk at the other store tomorrow. Saturday was the open house at the atlanta broadcasting institute.We were the first people there and i had to fill outsome papers asking shit like what stations do i like the most ,what are my hobbies,why am i there.Then other people started coming.they gave me some papers that were commercials and news reports, then i had to choose one to read.i had to go in the studio and read one of the papers but i didn't know i was being recorded but the lady said i did real good and that i could be in the summer program.It's gonna cost $500, that's not bad considering if you go to school after hight school they credit it to your tuition.anyway it was cool and all i have to do is work full time for two weeks and i'll have enough to go.yay!!!!! that's all folks |
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| Thursday, June 3rd, 2004 |
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Hello fuckers i just got home from hell/work, i've been helping out the store in Tucker,cause they don't have many people there but they also don't have mmany customers.i haven't been to my regular job in like 5 weeks, i'll go there on saturday but i have to get off early cause the Atlanta Broacasting Institute is having an open house that you have to attend if you want to go to the summer program.My dad said i have to pay now for my car.At first they said i didn't have to get it fixed but...okie dok if i can't get my liscense b4 the summer program iam gonna have to catch the bus...it's all the way in Marietta.My mom has to have surgery soon and i know it's gonna be hell around here!!!!for sadness' sake save me! think that's about it, oh yeah i need to gripe about work for a moment.First it was ok, not too many people working and not too many customers, but then this manager comes in(some new white guy) and i think he's a racist.He's rude to the mexicans and he makes jokes that i know mean more than ha ha.whatever, then it's people that come in around the time im leaving that are cool but are not my kind of people ya know.i'll live, bu it's very possible i might be working there for a couple of more weeks.that sucks. that's all folks |
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| Sunday, May 16th, 2004 |
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well i won't erase that...people hate me..YAY!!! well i don't hate anyone..in fact i care enough to do the right thing and let go of things that are damaging..i suggest everyone do the same. and please don't read this if you plan to take the things i say out of context...i didn't won't to be there and i didn't say u were wrong for going..i knew you were going to do it, cause i would have done the same damn thing.i was just proud. so next weekend is the official begginig of my vaction,even though i haven't been to work for a while. but going to florida will make things official.then when i get back i'll work full time.my mom and dad are getting my car fixed and i'll be at every concert this summer!!!!later |
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| Thursday, May 13th, 2004 |
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were have i been..... nothing much has happen..i went to prom saturday, now iam walking around with this ghetto hair and fake nails...but it's ok next week is the last week of school and then we go on vacation...jackie said she'd lend me some money so i'll be able to have a good time. the other day i was suppose to go to music midtown but gloria neede to sell the tickets to pay bills but she sold them to another friend and went with them. oh well...poetic justice huh. life is so funny... i think that's all |
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| Saturday, March 6th, 2004 |
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well i had a good day today, first i woke up at 7am but i decided not to do my hair and i had a lot of time to just chill before i went to work wich was cool, so then my mom told me to drive to work, and usually when i drive it takes like 30min but it took me like 15min. i was still late, so after my break i got to train this new girl which was cool cause i didn't have to do much. then when i got off work i went to the mall to see gloria and her friends and we just hung out....i haven't done that in a whileit was cool...really cool people were there and i saw noah and he looks like a grown man. oh and i got the new courtney love cd and i got gloria one since i didn't get har anythig for anything that's all folks |
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| Monday, March 1st, 2004 |
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 Fight Club! What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!) brought to you by Quizilla lucky me |
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| Thursday, February 26th, 2004 |
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 Which Buffy Girl Are You? Find out @ She's Crafty ya know what that's true....well if you know me then you do know Today it snowed and there was no school...it's funny that in new york they go to school in like 6feet of snow and we get a couple of flurries and the cancell everything...but iam not complaing. oh yeah i pierced my ear the other night, nothing special. |
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| Tuesday, February 24th, 2004 |
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i hate today school sucked ass, i got all depressed and had to hide and cry, then i fell asleep during a quiz, but i did it after class and told him he forgot to take my up, iam surprised it worked, then my sis picked me up from school and i wnated to do was go home watch buffy and check my e-mail, but she had to go get her beautician/friend/ex-roomate/lesbian lover with out the sex, then had to go back to the school to get my brother from track practice, then take him to sports authority to get some running shoes.then i decided to get some wendy's. but the worst part is i came home and didn't get the e-,ail i wanted, but i really shouldn't have expected it today. |
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| Monday, February 16th, 2004 |
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....iam sick, iam worse then sick,i can't look at the tv cause my eyes keep watering up, and i can't really see what iam typing,i had to work today without a fucking break, i never get a break, i hate working with people i don't know, that's why i don't like working extra.some girl was treating me like i was new, i've been ther for 3 fucking years bitch, get the fuck outta me way. iam too cheap to buy medicin,so i'ved been taking my mom, and i took them all(she always get the 200mg or less shit) I usually get the 500mg.i have a history project due tomorrow, but we know that won't get done. |
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| Thursday, February 12th, 2004 |
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hey heres a little photo shoot    u like...sure u do. well charlies out |
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| Wednesday, February 11th, 2004 |
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guess what....i died my hair bright red yeah i did i yesterday, i had a giftcard for hotopic and a 15%off card so i thought it'll b a good idea to do it. i'll get some pics up soon. this is the shit. i couldn't help but buy the metal for the masses 2 cd.it came with an extra cd with more then 150 mp3s. i had to get out of there or i would have spent all my money we had a "family meeting" the other day, and my mom said now that my bro has a job everyone should start chipping in, iam fine with that but i wish she would have told me that b4 i decided to save my money. but it'll work out. i got my guitar book, yeah iam such a good shopper, i can get my strings,picks,pedal,amp all for about $80 that's cool.i probably won't buy this stuff for a while though guess that's all later |
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| Monday, February 2nd, 2004 |
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iam not as hyper as i wanted to be...i took some caffine pills so i'd be hyper this morning but they didn't work.all it did was keep me from falling asleep. i wanted to be jumping off the fucking walls. anyway, i know iam turning into my mom, today i got all excited about this new cupoun thing were doing.(wtf) iam ashamed if myself j/k i'll holla |
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| Tuesday, January 27th, 2004 |
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HEY!!!!!! nothing new, just chillin |
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| Monday, November 24th, 2003 |
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sup iam back again so today was kinda shitty cause i woke up at 756am and had to leave the house at 8am so i threw on my new ed,edd,and eddy shiry with the pants i wore to work yesterday, i just got done cleaning a little cause were having a huge gathering for thanksgiving.(stressful) guess that's all...later |
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| Sunday, November 23rd, 2003 |
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whoo hoo iam old well iam 17 yeah my b-day sucked i got some money and ballons and my sis bought me some cinique perfume, and i got a stale cake what i really wanted to do is go out but i didn't, actually my grandparents took me and the rest of my family out to breafast, that was cool. i guess everythings been cool... glad the holidays are around...iam excited to buy gifts for some reason, iam getting everyone something this year. well not you... i promise to get back on this thing. |
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| Wednesday, October 29th, 2003 |
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hey ya Where the hell have i been around.... been busy and this computer has been acting funny and we had problems on internet servicve and i probably won't be updating much i feel so lost...i haven't kept up with afi or the otep board...i feel weird. i need some reinforcement i got this guy in my class to make some cd's cause these are the ones i probably wouldn't buy 1)staind-14 shades of grey(actually i would buy this) 2)evanescense(however u spell it) 3)coldplay-parachutes,a rush of blood to the head 4)tricky-vunerable 5)the ataris 6)audioslave and some more but i forgot |
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| Monday, September 1st, 2003 |
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Found this posted on Witches' Voice: Wear the ribbon! Proclaimed from: Warren Posted by: Denraeah SnowDragon Posted on: 8/6/2003 Details: Someone had an excellent idea, and I'm here to pass it on! "On Sept. 21st to 22nd all wiccans are going to wear little purple ribbons so everyone will know who else is a witch/wiccan. But no one can do this if they don't know about it, so pass the word along!" I suggest sharing this amoung witches. This message goes to all witches and wiccans. We can make a day for ourselves!! Actually, two days... Honouring us!!! You can buy a purple ribbon anywhere, dollar store, wal-mart, shoppers drug mart, anywhere. Wear it in your hair, or pin it up to your shirt. Make it public!!! |
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| Thursday, August 28th, 2003 |
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hey!!!!! afi won mtv2 award, thanks to me, and a couple of thousand fans, the 5th colum rules...... |
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| Sunday, August 17th, 2003 |
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ohhh.. fallon this is a new pic and i won't even say who i thought it was. well she has a new advice coloum, so if ur feeling like shit let her know cause i sure as hell won't help u  http://www.jadedhearts.com/advicecolumn can't see it? go to www.aassault.com |
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DeadJournal for Neglected Porn Star.
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dirty.
tired.
mellow.
indescribable.
giddy.
energetic.
peaceful.
depressed.
sick.
horny.
accomplished.
artistic.
blank.
enthralled.
blah.